Sunday afternoons are busy at Red Bowl. A lot of people come to eat there after church.
Towards the end of my shift, I overheard one of the servers talking with a group in the party room talking about religion and the Gospel. The group was from a non-denominational church. From what I could understand, they weren’t big fans of traditional churches. “We just want to follow Jesus,” one of them said.
I cringed a little bit–it always bothers me when people reject other churches (which are also part of the body of Christ) based on preconceived notions that aren’t always correct. I go to a church that one might deem “traditional,” and I know plenty of people there who are very passionate about Jesus and the Gospel.
But I digress.
Anyway, for a second, I wondered about if the people in that group had a solid theology supporting the things they were saying about the Gospel because, well, good theology kinda matters.
But then I thought, “Well, if God set up this encounter so that they’d have a chance to proclaim the Gospel, whatever happens is up to Him. So, whatever. Good for them, I guess.”
I’ve been “back on the market” for well over a month now (see my posts on my dating sabbatical).
Nothing’s really changed other than my willingness oogle at cute boys (with no intention of ever pursuing them).
Sometimes, when I pray, though, I’ll be like, “Hey, God. If you could send some cool Christian dude my way, that would be awesome!”
Part of me hopes God says yes. The other part of me wants me to slap myself for being so goofy.
What’s up, world?
I’ve got a confession to make. I’ve been putting off praying and spending time in the Bible. I’ve been consuming hours of television shows like Lost and Fullmetal Alchemist because I don’t want to think about praying or spending time in the Bible.
I don’t even want to talk to my Christian friends about my troubles. I don’t want to have to tell people that things aren’t okay. I don’t want to be told how to “fix” things and I don’t want to talk about God. I don’t want to be told there’s something wrong with me or that I need to change. I don’t want to try to make new friends. I don’t want to be forced to be around people because I’m afraid of people and I’m afraid they won’t understand me.
A lot of times, I wish things could go back to being the way they were before. Everything seemed so much easier then. People left me alone and I didn’t have to worry about pleasing anyone except myself.
I’ve already said that my year off from dating taught me how to be a better friend to guys. That statement isn’t entirely correct. And it sounds kinda goofy.
It taught me how to be a better friend. Period.
My friend circle includes girls, too, ya know. I wasn’t good to them before because I was too busy chasing guys. Chasing guys meant…well, that was all I was really preoccupied with as far as my social life went, so it kinda figures I wasn’t trying that hard to be anyone’s friend. It’s kind of embarrassing to admit, but that’s what it was.
So now what?
I guess I’ll continue taking in the rain and hope I produce a crop useful to for whom it is farmed. Or as my mentor person puts it, I’ll be hanging out in God’s workshop.
I’ll be letting you know how that goes.
